Wednesday, January 5, 2011


In the Chicago Tribune today there is a story about a Winnetka woman who apparently has nothing better to do than panic at the drop of a.... butt.  Her husband accidentally butt-dialed her (as he was driving home) and when all she heard was muffled sounds and hip hop music, she immediately jumped to the conclusion that he was being held hostage....  ???  Seriously.

So the SWAT team ends up at his workplace.  It takes them three hours to get to 'all clear'.  In the meantime, the guy is at his house since he had butt-dialed her ON HIS WAY HOME.  What the article doesn't say is if a followup call was made to the cops to let them know that the guy was okay.  I'm assuming not.  And they are not going to charge the stupid bint for being stupid--not for just calling the cops due to muffled rap music, but for not calling them back when he got home.  The article says that the 'man is embarrassed.' .  Duh.  I'd be embarrassed to for having such an abominably stupid spousal unit.

Okay, I love Himself very much.  But if he called and all I heard was muffled noises and hip hop music, I don't think my first thought would be that he's being held hostage (but I might question his musical taste).  My first thought would be that he butt-dialed me.  Maybe I'm not paranoid enough....  I know how long (approximately) it takes him to get from Point A to Point B so if I was unable to reach him within a reasonable amount of time, or if he didn't show up at the door in a reasonable amount of time, I'd take steps at that point. 

But if I felt the need to call out the troops, you can bet it's because I'd exhausted all other avenues and if he showed up during his own man hunt, I'd let everyone know he was safe.  I guess that's the part that gets me.  Okay, calling the cops because you're worried (and not bright)--that I can ALMOST see.  But not calling them back--I really hope they don't have kids--that kind of stupid doesn't need to enter the gene-pool.  GAH!

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