Sunday, September 21, 2014

Got Troll?

An increasing number of folks I know are getting what a friend and I refer to as Basement Trolls--adults who, for whatever reason, are moving home for whatever excuse they can think of.  A friend of mine thought she'd gotten rid of her Basement Troll, but they are kind of like bad pennies and come back when you least expect them.

In studying the behavior of Basement Trolls, I've found that they seem to like semi-subterranean rooms with wall-to-wall carpeting and wi-fi.  Being paid to do things around the house that would be expected as part of living at home, if they were younger than age 18, along with free room and board seem to encourage their nesting instincts and make it harder to root them out of their new lairs. 

While it's possible to prevent Basement Troll infestation through statements regarding the enforcement of rules, curfews, and daily chores, once they have settled in, anything outside of moving to a new home or cutting off their wi-fi connection won't remove them.

6 comments:

Brigid said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Brigid said...

Previous comment was mine, duplicate.

I made noise about moving home in my early 20's to save on lodging while working and going to school. Dad said fine and handed me a slip of paper with what I would pay in "room and board". It was several hundred dollars a month. It also came with a list of house rules.

I got the point. I stayed in my little apartment with two room mates and quit spending so much on eating out and toys.

Old NFO said...

Cut the wifi, they'll be gone in two days... :-)

Atom Smasher said...

I moved back home when I left my grad program prematurely (irreconcilable differences with this guy: http://web.uri.edu/geo/david-fastovsky/ - brilliant Paleontologist, horrible mentor/advisor) and was looking for a new program. Never did resume that path. Anyway, my parents were as accommodating as one could dream, we stayed out of each others' way brilliantly, and I couldn't have asked for a better arrangement while worked and searched.

I was ready for parent-o-cide in 2 months.

I really, really couldn't go home again. I moved on after about 9 months.

Frankly, I don't see how anyone could do it successfully, on EITHER side.

exchange mom said...

Orkin will trap and relocate out in the woods but the transport fee is hefty, since it takes two exterminators to lift the trap. Basement trolls weigh more than your standard fat raccoon.

Brigid said...

"basement trolls weight more than your standard fat raccoon'.

Brilliant!! Still laughing my head off.