Thursday, October 6, 2011

TSA Canine Agent Barkley

During my sojourn at the Range this last weekend, I had a run-in with TSA Canine Agent Barkley.  Apparently the contents of my little overnight bag were deemed by him to be a danger to the Range and its occupants so he needed to inspect my belongings thoroughly.


TSA Barkley:

Hmmm....  stiletto heels.  Sorry ma'am.  These can possibly be used as weapons.  I must confiscate them.

Women's delicates?  Sorry ma'am.  These can be considered to be a weapon in the right hands.  I must confiscate these items.

Ma'am, are you aware that your bottle of shampoo is WAY above the 3 ounce limit?  It can possibly be used as a weapon.  I must confiscate this bottle of 'Gee, Your Hair Smells Terrific'.

I can let you keep the pistol, the knives, the tweezers, the finger-nail file, and the pepper spray.

And we can possibly be persuaded to forgo the enhanced body patdown in exchange for this venison summer sausage......

9 comments:

Brigid said...

HAHAHAHAHA! They should recruit him. The underwear bomber never would have gotten through.

The Summer Sausage is AWESOME.
B.

Borepatch said...

Ma'am, I must protest this calumny. To link such a noble creature with the TSA calls for at least a woof of protest!

Midwest Chick said...

B--Glad you like it!

Borepatch--you didn't have to chase him around trying to retrieve dress shoes, tennis shoes, hosiery, and other *ahem* sundries. He is a fabulous creature though and I do hate besmirching his good name. Very playful and loving--he's a lot of fun to play chase with.

Brigid said...

I rent him out for parties. . .

just saying

Midwest Chick said...

*giggle*

Larry said...

Good thing that Barks is on the job. The country is in good hands...er, paws...
And he works for snausage...

Midwest Chick said...

Larry--exactly! And the country would be in better paws/hands if he was in charge.

God, Gals, Guns, Grub said...

I'm not sure that referring to Barkley as a TSA agent might not be an insult to his intelligence...

Dann in Ohio

Midwest Chick said...

Dann--he's WAY smarter than the average TSA agent. Got me to give up some summer sausage.... Or maybe I can't resist that doggy grin of glee.